I'm Glad I Had a Footlong. The Napkins Came in Handy

"I was oddly content not trying to predict the outcome of the movie because i was too busy trying to control my emotions." Roland Ferrie, circa last night.

Let me set the stage:
Two 25 year olds.
One patio love seat. (Not ideal for two larger than life people. He in ego, me in bum width)
Crisp night. A light jacket was suitable.
A nice computer with an irritatingly dirty screen.
Black dog at our feet.
Tears-a-plenty.

As we started to watch the movie, my hopes were high. I could feel it in my bones that this was gonna be a winner. Like maybe not as winner as any Tom Hanks movie ever made, because if we're being honest with ourselves, that man is pure gold. But I knew it was going to be good. Andie MacDowell was in it and ever since her epic performance in Groundhog Day, my life has been forever changed. So yes. I was hopeful. Mister Ro on the other hand was less than optimistic. But let's be frank here, there are many movies that I bring home from my job at the FamVid that are less than stellar- like the one movie we watched about a support group for zombies- not exactly a homerun. So based on previous experience, Ro may have had reason to question.

Anyway, last night, on the most Sunday of Sundays, I forced Mister Ro to watch The 5th Quarter with me. It started out like a Hallmark, Made for TV Movie. The opening scene consisted of old fading pictures set to cheesy, yet whimsical, piano music. Before you know it, you see a 15 year-old boy kissing his father as he's dropped of at school (Um- that right there was enough to scream OXYGEN network. What boy at 15 kisses their father. In front to people. None that I know. Or that I've seen outside of Jerry Springer-which is a whole other blog post) In any case, cheesy music continues, yada yada, family love ensues, yada yada, and before we know it we're at the tragedy of the movie that defines the plot.

Now I think it's important to note that I generally am not a huge crier. I didn't cry when I got my caugh*8th*caugh tattoo. I didn't cry when Brad and Emily broke up. And I didn't even cry when the cast of Dancing with the Stars was announced tonight. Which by the way, I totally should have because they all are crap. I just don't shed tears that easily. Unless my heart is really hurting. Then I cry. More like wail. If I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna REALLY do it.

As this tragedy unfolds, I couldn't help myself. The tears started to well in my eye beds. If I blinked they were going to fall. So instead I sat there wide eyed, hoping a gust of wind would come and help a sister out. No such luck. I blinked and down they went. I felt silly. Until i heard just seconds after the blubbering and sniffling fool next to me

So there we sat, both crying like babies, sniffling like fools, consumed by emotion. Mind you- this is about 13 minutes into the movie. Great. We're screwed. It's a good thing I had a few Subway napkins left over from my $5 footlong. It was at probably the most moving/emotional part of the movie that Ro and I really let our emotions get the best of us. Not only were we snot-nosed sobbing, but we started laughing hysterically. I can not even imagine what we looked like from the neighbors who of course were peering out of their kitchen window at us. PA to the THETIC. (figuring out how to type that wasn't nearly as easy as it should have been. The double 'the THE' really threw me for a minute. Don't judge.)

In any case, this movie was good. No- check that- great. Roland didn't even talk excessively or point out the coloring, film effects, or director's errors. For him, this is huge. Something actually shut him up. Unfortunately I was not so lucky while watching the Bachelor Pad tonight... but I digress.

So yes. We cried numerous times. Felt uplifted. And just plain silly by our over-emotional showing. Our only comic relief during the movie was the character Rachel and her impeccably timed facial reactions. If you watch the movie, you might understand. We just couldn't get enough. So watch this movie. Watch it with your kids. Watch it with your youth group. Watch it alone (probably the best idea since tears are almost inevitable). Maybe you can do it without the love seat, lap-top, and neighbors peering in on you. But watch it. You'll be glad you did.

*Let it be known that though I work for FamVid, these views are my own and I was in no way paid to review this movie. Though it they would have offered, I totally would have accepted. I am not above that. Word.